Итак, я рассудил сам в себе не приходить к вам опять с огорчением.
So I made up my mind that I would not make another painful visit to you.
For I made up my mind not to make another painful visit to you.
But I determined this for my own sake, that I would not come to you in sorrow again.
So I decided that I would not bring you grief with another painful visit.
But I determined this with myself, that I would not come again to you in heaviness.
But I determined this within myself, that I would not come again to you in sorrow.
But I have judged this with myself, not to come back to you in grief.